Trauma as Tactic

Finding My Lane

Anyone else feeling overwhelmed? I feel like my head is on a swivel constantly whirling from one side to the other. Unable to fully grasp what is happening in one direction before being whipped abruptly the other way. It seems this is deliberate, leaving all of us so dazed that we aren’t able to fully comprehend what is happening. Diana Butler Bass wrote recently on Substack,

that trauma is the goal. She writes, “Traumatized people can’t respond. Traumatized people go along. Traumatized people isolate themselves. Traumatized people can’t think clearly.” This kind of relentless barrage of jaw dropping whiplash is traumatic and trauma literally causes tunnel vision. When we are in DPA (Diffuse Physiological Activation) protection and survival are the main goals. This is an adaptive process. During this cascade of events our ability to take in information decreases. We lose our problem-solving skills and our capacity for empathy is diminished. (John Gottman, “The Science of Trust”)

What can we do when we are feeling all of this and our nervous systems are just doing what nervous systems do, getting activated by perceived threat. We can take a deep breath. We can slow ourselves down, and we can widen our view. Remember that DPA tends to give us a narrow view. Broadening our sights helps with moving our brains back to problem solving and logical thinking. This goal of keeping us so stressed that we can’t think, at least some of the time is working on me. How about you? Do you have days when the overload is too much?

This situation requires us to be both/and people. We have to find the best sources of information, keep up with it as we can, and we have to focus on what we still have. Finding joy in the daffodils that are already popping up in my yard while understanding that our country was recently added to the CIVICUS Monitor Watchlist, a research tool that publicizes the status of freedoms and threats to civil liberties worldwide. We now join countries like Pakistan, DRC, Italy, and Serbia.

I have gotten into the habit of listening to “The Convocation Unscripted” with Jemar Tisby, Robert P. Jones, Diana Butler Bass and Kristin Du Mez.

They record a new episode each week and I have found them to be both informative and helpful. Their combined knowledge as three historians and one sociologist provides insights that I wouldn’t be able to come to on my own.

It wasn’t long ago on an episode Jemar Tisby talked about finding your lane. He shared that many of us are overwhelmed by onslaught of disturbing and anxiety provoking information that comes at us each and every day. I find myself wondering, “What is my lane?” I cannot fight or even honestly care deeply about each and every group or institution that is being threatened or erased.

I do care about LBGTQ people in general and Trans people in particular, is this my lane? I care about people of color, is this my lane? I care about immigrants, Is this my lane? I care about public education, is this my lane? I care about children’s health and the misinformation around vaccinations, is this my lane? I care about the environment, is this my lane? I care about local libraries, is this my lane? I care about women, is this my lane?

This is just the dynamic that is causing my head to twirl around from one area of need to another, making it difficult to stay between the lines and clearly see “my lane.” Sometimes what I am imagining looks more like that tangled, cloverleafed, marvel of modern civil engineering common in big metropolitan areas than the two-lane roads that crisscross rural America where I live. I do care about all of these issues and many more. For now, my focus is on the issues that affect half of the population. Issues around women and women’s rights. This includes all women and anyone who identifies as female, regardless of the letter attached to their birth certificate.

My lane is women’s issues. I will stay open to the many issues that keep coming at me, but I will put my energy toward the ones that are clearly related to women. What is your lane? Where will you put your energy? If we all stay calm and focused, we can make a difference together in our respective lanes. This is one way we can avoid the trauma that keeps us quiet. We can’t do everything, but we can do something. Keep strong, find your lane, and take care of yourselves.